The Listander Boys: 37 Weeks 5 Days

This last week was very difficult as it was filled with memories of Joshua and wishing he was here. We tried to fill the week with relaxing activities to help make it a better week. We had a lot of people praying for us and overall, I think the week went as good as it could, considering the circumstances. We really appreciated all of the prayer support and felt God's provision of comfort in the midst of our pain.

The day before Halloween, a Phil's BBQ opened up in Santee. Eddie and I had never been before and wanted to visit, but we expected a line around the block. We were pleasantly surprised to find no line and quick service. It was busy inside, but they had plenty of workers. We each ordered the ribs and chicken and it was delicious.

Exhibit A

Also, when we checked the mail that evening we were so surprised and incredibly thankful to find that the DMV sent a letter approving Eddie to drive again!!! Eddie did a dance of celebration and I got tears in my eyes. I was so very tired of driving and my belly was not fitting behind the wheel very well. It was just in time for our day of activities on Halloween the next day and we no longer had to worry about me going into labor and finding a ride to the hospital. It was a huge blessing in the middle of a tough week.

Delighting in his new freedom :)

Halloween morning we started the day with breakfast at Janets. It was super peaceful out on the patio and while I was sleepy (woke up at 3:30 am and didn't fall asleep again until 5:45 am), it felt relaxing. 3:30 is a special time for me. I woke up at 3:30 every night for potty breaks while pregnant with Joshua and he was born at 3:36 am. Now, while pregnant with Caleb, I still wake up at 3:30 each night and it reminds me of Joshua.

After breakfast, we drove out to the zoo and walked around visiting monkeys, tigers, bears, and otters. It was nice to go at our own pace and the keepers were feeding several of the animals while we were there. The only bummer to the trip was that the escalators were broken. We did not find this out until we were already at the bottom of the hill. So, we climbed stairs back to the entrance. Nothing to make you feel more pregnant than climbing stairs with kids running by you playing tag. I told Eddie that was my workout for the week.

Resting on a bench watching the monkeys

Our next stop was to a restaurant right on the water near the airport. It was delicious food and again, a very peaceful atmosphere. The best part of the meal was when our server brought out the dessert. A giant slice of mud pie with congratulations written on the plate in chocolate and a candle lit on the plate. She told me it was to congratulate us on our first baby. Even though she was referring to Caleb, I didn't correct her since I knew that we were in fact celebrating our first baby. It was a sweet moment to blow out Joshua's candle for his first birthday. And it had some comedic relief in that when I tried to blow the candle out, the flame did not even flicker. I'm not sure if I couldn't lean far enough due to my belly or what, but Eddie had a good laugh and he blew it out for me. I kept the candle to put in Joshua's memory box. Unfortunately, we did not think to take a picture before we devoured the dessert, but at least I have the candle.

Stuffed with delicious food, we drove to our hotel and were surprised with a free upgrade to a balcony room. It was a slow night and the grounds were quiet and peaceful.

View into the courtyard from our room

The next morning we ate breakfast at the hotel before leaving to go to our doctor's appointment. At the appointment, Caleb was measuring 7 lbs. 15 ounces. which confirmed that those measurements are quiet inaccurate. The week before he was 6 lbs. 8 ounces. He's such a fast growing baby! :) Still head down as he should be and still looking healthy. We also discussed my kidney stone results a bit. It turns out they are struvite stones, which are usually always caused by infection (urinary tract infections). I have had numerous urine cultures throughout the pregnancy, all of which say no infection is present, so that is quite confusing. She also confirmed that there is at least one if not two more stones in the right kidney. So I have an appointment with a urology surgeon on Thursday, the 8th, to discuss a plan of action. I'm pretty sure nothing will happen until after Caleb is born, so even more reason for him to come out soon!

Yesterday for Joshua's birthday, Eddie and I went to the cemetery and hung his giraffe wind chime on his tree and we brought flowers that we had picked out in the colors of a giraffe. We were surprised to see how much his tree had grown and that it had flowers blooming. It was so hard to wish that we could hold him again and celebrate his birthday together as a family. It somewhat helped to think of how Caleb will be involved in years to come. Picking out flowers to bring to his brother's tree and telling him about Joshua. I kept telling Eddie, "I'm so glad that he's not really in the ground, that he's still alive". It reminded me of Easter. Not to be irreverent, but just that with Easter we have Good Friday of thinking about Christ's death and then Sunday we celebrate that He is alive. We had Halloween of thinking about Joshua's death, but then Friday we were able to celebrate that he is alive. And it's all because of Jesus dying on the cross.